What to When You Can't Stop Thinking About Your Past
Hi! My name is Jen Mele of Jennifer Mele.com, Abstract Intuitive artist, inspired teacher & e-course creator.
I teach the philosophies & mindbody Techniques I have used to create a compassionate inner relationship with my wisest Self as well as transform my life from relationships, to business to my body & mind.
This is how I create & sustain an inspired life. by continuously connecting to this inner wisdom which naturally unleashes the unique gifts that make me come alive. And I know the same is true for you. You have your own wise warrior within An inspired life is full of joy, peace, self expression & abundance. It is created by tapping into the unique guidance that can only come from inside of YOU.
Whose afraid of the friendly ghost? Is that how it goes? Casper anyone??
Even if those ghosts weren’t friendly in the least, I’m here to let you know that you don’t have to walk around today fearing those same ghosts are going to return or that you deserve to be haunted by past experiences, choices or mistakes that you’ve made.
If anything, it’s often the people who are aware and have already changed certain behavior or are aware and couldn’t have done something differently that can beat themselves up the most.
Let me repeat that again in another way. It is usually the experiences that we could not change that we beat ourselves up over the most because the constant obsessing, worrying and analyzing makes us FEEL like we are doing something, that it was in our control.
However, than we feel like utter shit because self blame and shame hamster wheels are some of THE worst feelings.
Please do yourself a favor and watch this video where I offer two helpful and compassionate tips on how to stop the past from haunting you so you can live an inspired life joyfully in the present!
[youtube=://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uBGCpAgNgAI&w=854&h=480]
What do you think? Compassion feels so much better doesn't it? And don't be hard on yourself if you are NOT there yet either. You WILL get there.
I'm here for you!
Xo, Jen
What to Do When You Can't Stop Thinking About The Worst Case Scenario
As I sit here on a plane, I’m thinking about this next video and worse case scenarios. Some of you might be already wondering where I’m going with this...is she really going to be talking about worse case scenarios while on a plane?
But the reality is, I’ve never had a fear of flying. Im not concerned that me talking about fears and flying will trigger me or magically make what I’m talking about happen. Why? Because I’m just not invested in fear related to this topic at all.
I’m using this as an example because there have been and still are times I get triggered with fear and my mind starts playing out worst case scenarios.
But I use this example because it shows how malleable the mind is, how fears are based on the unique experiences we have, and that if someone has minimal or no fear in a situation than its possible for someone else to get to that point too!
After reducing fear, It doesn’t mean fear won’t come up or a thought won’t come up, it just won’t be super intense and will be much more easier to center.
In this video I discuss two reasons why we are programmed to think about Worst case scenarios.
The most important piece is knowing that worst car scenario thinking comes from an emotion that naturally wants to communicate it. Our chemicals and molecules are doing the fear dance like mad!
Watch this video and let me know what you think in the comments.
[youtube=://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T9pbI4srTlE&w=854&h=480]
Do you have any situations where you tend to think about the worse case scenario?
Are you open to believing that the worst case outcome is highly likely to not be true?
Are you able to reassure the part that is fearful that no matter what you will be there for her?
I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences!
I'm here for you!
Xo, Jen
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What To Do When You're Feeling Stuck In the Same Patterns
This rich and metaphorical poem is one of my favorites over the years. Take a peek and let me know what you think!
Autobiography in 5 Chapters, A Poem by Portia Nelson
Chapter One.
I walk down the street. There’s a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost. I am helpless. It isn’t my fault. It still takes forever to find a way out.
Chapter Two.
I walk down the same street. There’s a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don’t see it. I fall in again. I can’t believe I’m in the same place! But it isn’t my fault and it still takes a long time to get out.
Chapter Three.
I walk down the same street. There’s a deep hole in the sidewalk. I see it there. I still fall in. It’s a habit!My eyes are open. I know where I am. It is my fault. I get out immediately.
Chapter Four.
I walk down the same street. There’s a deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it.
Chapter Five.
I walk down a different street.
There was an interesting commentary on Elephant Journal by Barbara Becker where she states that her Meditation Teacher explains to her that there is a Chapter 6.
I find this to be really interesting because it has been almost 8 years since I originally read this poem.
After my own personal journey and witnessing it among clients, this sixth chapter, according to Becker and her teacher, is that once we head down the new road, there is another hole, and we fall in again.
I have to admit at first glance reading this I didn't really want to hear it. I mean, who wants to keep falling into holes? It's exhausting right?
I want to get to the road where there are no holes. Where the streets are paved with gold like my Uncle would say.
And yet, as I continue on my own path I keep seeing that yes, there are always some more holes.
It doesn't mean I don't get better at climbing out .And I find that there happens to be a lot more time spent on certain roads now without the holes.
But inevitably, there will be ups and downs. It's not about having those downs that means we have done something wrong.
It's how can we be more compassionate to ourselves, more curious and get more information about what's happened and how we can apply it (gently) to what comes next.
Image by Sherry Riter of www.theredheadriter.com
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