What To Do When You're Feeling Stuck In the Same Patterns
This rich and metaphorical poem is one of my favorites over the years. Take a peek and let me know what you think!
Autobiography in 5 Chapters, A Poem by Portia Nelson
Chapter One.
I walk down the street. There’s a deep hole in the sidewalk. I fall in. I am lost. I am helpless. It isn’t my fault. It still takes forever to find a way out.
Chapter Two.
I walk down the same street. There’s a deep hole in the sidewalk. I pretend I don’t see it. I fall in again. I can’t believe I’m in the same place! But it isn’t my fault and it still takes a long time to get out.
Chapter Three.
I walk down the same street. There’s a deep hole in the sidewalk. I see it there. I still fall in. It’s a habit!My eyes are open. I know where I am. It is my fault. I get out immediately.
Chapter Four.
I walk down the same street. There’s a deep hole in the sidewalk. I walk around it.
Chapter Five.
I walk down a different street.
There was an interesting commentary on Elephant Journal by Barbara Becker where she states that her Meditation Teacher explains to her that there is a Chapter 6.
I find this to be really interesting because it has been almost 8 years since I originally read this poem.
After my own personal journey and witnessing it among clients, this sixth chapter, according to Becker and her teacher, is that once we head down the new road, there is another hole, and we fall in again.
I have to admit at first glance reading this I didn't really want to hear it. I mean, who wants to keep falling into holes? It's exhausting right?
I want to get to the road where there are no holes. Where the streets are paved with gold like my Uncle would say.
And yet, as I continue on my own path I keep seeing that yes, there are always some more holes.
It doesn't mean I don't get better at climbing out .And I find that there happens to be a lot more time spent on certain roads now without the holes.
But inevitably, there will be ups and downs. It's not about having those downs that means we have done something wrong.
It's how can we be more compassionate to ourselves, more curious and get more information about what's happened and how we can apply it (gently) to what comes next.
Image by Sherry Riter of www.theredheadriter.com
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Discover Your Intention for the Year with This Art Journaling PDF!
Happy New Year My Friends!
This year I've decided that TRUST is the word and experience I am choosing to embody for 2018.
I am choosing to deepen my trust in the process and allow things to unfold exactly as they are meant to. This means trusting my Higher Self and the inner wisdom within that feels peaceful, calm and centered.
I am also choosing to deepen my trust in others. This isn't the haphazard throw-caution-to-the-wind type of trust that I use to experience years ago.
It's not the impulsive, spontaneous, fear-based decision that reinforced my doubt in myself and avoided the confusion about who and what to trust.
This is the type of TRUST that is based on a gentle curiosity over time about those people in my life who keep showing up for me and I for them.
Those people who share many of the same similar values that I do.
Those people that I can be my authentic Self with and vice versa.
- PRACTICE
If you are interested in finding out what your Intentional Word of the Year is, I've created a little PDF for you where you can do some free writing, doodling and/or art journaling.
Click the image below to download your free copy!
P.S. Do you want to fine tune your Inner Radar with crystal clear clarity for Love, Wealth + Freedom? My Free Start Up Guide Includes my 5 Star Process To Become the Intuitive Rockstar of your #5StarLife! This process transformed my life and is the foundation of everything I do in my life & biz! ⭐️🙌🏼👯♀️
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How I Realized I Was Painting Parts of Me
It's been a healing time and a blessing to share my art these days.
I've been fortunate enough to be able to share these therapeutic art practices with clients as well, many of whom were skeptical at first to even go to this nonverbal place and now they are creating pictures every week!
There is a large epidemic of creative wounding in our culture so when we are asked to draw, paint, or create, there may be parts of us that want to shut down. Interestingly, art and creativity can be the very thing that help us to open up more!
I have been creating several bodies of work, one of which has hundreds of little paintings that I just felt compelled to keep creating...and I still do.
The above mandalas (Mandala means Sacred Circle in sanskrit) are just some of the many circular forms I have been captivated by for over the past 5 months. I see each mandala as a mini world. Sometimes they look like moons or planets.
But what stands out to me the most is their organic nature. How when I use the inks and water, they each become unique and expressive. How each image has so much movement even though they are in two dimensional form.
I realized something more deep and meaningful was going on here after laying out all the pieces. They are like a gigantic tapestry of my life and all of the experience I have had to heal from.
After really sitting with the feelings of familiarity, adoration, fascination, and attraction to these little minis, I have realized that they are mini me's.
Each one represents a wound I have experienced. When each wound comes through artistically to be expressed, the finished piece often represents their healing. Sometimes the very act of painting them finalizes the Healing. Some show that they are still in the healing process.
Once I shared with my boyfriend about the meaning behind these paintings, he told me he became sad because he was visualizing my child self looking like a slice of swiss cheese.
All these holes where the daggers that had poked and prodded and penetrated my vulnerable child skin. I feel emotional too when I contemplate this work, a deep grief when I think back through my journey.
However, simultaneously, now I feel deep gratitude. Gratitude that I can feel. Gratitude that I have climbed mountains and hurdles that I never thought I would.
Gratitude that healing is possible.
Gratitude that I went from a hole to a box to a place unknown, until I finally could see a horizon line. Many times over.
That now I am not only seeing a horizon line...I am being offered long stretches and moments to sit back and bask in the sunrise.
That's what's so powerful about the mandala. The circular nature just breathes movement, the cycle of life, and connection.
Which is also similar to the model of Internal Family Systems which I use that says we each have True Self and we each have parts that have become disconnected from our Self.
When we can give these parts attention, they start orbiting harmoniously within our internal system receiving the love of our Inner True Self (the bindu/center point) of our being.
Just like the celestial bodies that inhabit our universe, these paintings portray the parts of me that exist in my personal universe, my internal system and each one has own it's image, thoughts, and experiences.
If you would like to get to know your parts better, I am releasing a new Expressive Art Journaling course at the end of this month that will specifically address the topic of releasing relationship wounds.
The beginning of a new year is a great time to deepen our mindfulness and compassion of any past hurts and resentments we may be holding onto (family, romantic, work, friendship etc.)
Writing and simple art practices will be used to deepen the release by connecting mind with body. Beginners and people who deem themselves are "non-artists" are encouraged to join*!
(*Not only do I think everyone has a creator within, these are not technical practices. They are journaling practices to help assist you with witnessing the parts of yourself that need attention.)
Click here for the free signup!
Some examples of the Many Parts of Me
Lot's of Love, Jen
P.S. Do you want to fine tune your Inner Radar with crystal clear clarity for Love, Wealth + Freedom? My Free Start Up Guide Includes my 5 Star Process To Become the Intuitive Rockstar of your #5StarLife! This process transformed my life and is the foundation of everything I do in my life & biz! ⭐️🙌🏼👯♀️
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